Doris Joan Larsen Hayes

The earthly life of Doris Joan Larsen Hayes, 91, came to a peaceful end on Saturday, December 5 at Westminster Woods at Julington Creek in St. Johns, Florida, where she had lived since 1997.  Born on Valentine’s Day of 1929 in Brooklyn, NY, Doris was the second-born child of Norwegian immigrants, Wilhelm (Billy) and Anna Martin Larsen.  Her brother, Howard, was nine years her senior and, for much of her life, a mentor to Doris.  Her childhood in the Bay Ridge Scandinavian neighborhoods included numerous anecdotes about her irrepressible nature, as well as being the provenance of lifelong friendships and her religious nurturing at Bethelship Norwegian Methodist Church, where her mother was a revered lay leader.  During her teens, Doris attended Hampden DuBose Academy, a Christian boarding school in Zellwood, Florida. Doris began her undergraduate studies at Houghton College, where early on, she heard the news of her mother’s sudden death.  She left Houghton after her first year, but not before meeting her future husband, Calvin Hayes, who was aspiring to be a minister. Though family lore weaves a hilarious tale of Cal’s dogged pursuit, eventually it was successful when these two were united in marriage on 17 June 1951 at Doris’s home church in Brooklyn, serendipitously officiated by her father-in-law, the Rev. James Hayes.

Once seminary studies were complete, Cal accepted the call of three American Baptist churches in northern Maine seeking pastoral leadership, i.e., in Hodgdon, Cary, and Amity.  For Doris, Aroostook County was a long way from the familial setting of Brooklyn and a startling culture shock.  However, always determined, Doris persevered and made the best of it, including giving birth to their first two sons, Stephen and Timothy.  In 1956, they moved to Milo when Cal became pastor of the United Baptist Church.  Soon after, Doris gave birth to their third son, Paul, and two years later, Peter was born.  Four boys within six years was an ambitious and daunting responsibility for a young mother!  But, characteristically, Doris accomplished far more than anyone could imagine.  When Cal accepted the call to the First Baptist Church of Bangor in 1963, Doris went back to school, finishing her college degree in seven semesters at the University of Maine in Orono and commencing her career in elementary education.  Five years later, the family moved to Falmouth, when Cal was hired as the Area Minister for western and southern regions of the American Baptist Churches of Maine, a position he held for four years before returning to the pastorate, becoming the Senior Pastor of Central Square Baptist Church in Portland.  Doris, meanwhile, continued her teaching career with the Falmouth School District, while completing her Masters degree at the University of Maine at Portland-Gorham (now USM).  She taught fifth grade at Plummer-Motz Elementary and later became a Reading Specialist for the Falmouth School district until she and Cal mutually retired in 1990.

Throughout her adult life, Doris was the hub of family life and a leader in many organizations.  Often in the role of “first lady” in their churches, she was engaged at every level of church and denominational life, including choir member, substitute organist, and in church and statewide women’s groups.  She served as national president for the American Baptist Minister Wives in the early 1970s.  Her interest in global life and denominational missions led Cal and Doris to travel to more than 70 countries over the course of their 56-year marriage.

When Cal’s dementia was diagnosed, the two of them moved from their home in North Fort Myers, FL to the Jacksonville area, where they settled into the community at Westminster Woods at Julington Creek, a continuing care campus in St. Johns.  The last chapter of the lives was centered around the myriad of new friendships and activities they enjoyed, participation in the choir and congregational life of Hendricks Avenue Baptist Church, and being close to Peter and Carol and their family.  At WWJC, Doris served on the Resident Council, the Campus Informed Newcomer’s Club, and sang in the community choir and played both the organ and piano for chapel services.  This was ideal for Doris in her support of Cal, but mainly after he died on his 81 ^st birthday in 2007.  It was a fortuitous (and characteristically prudent) decision by Doris to make such a move to maintain their quality of life in later years.

Doris’s daily schedule was largely agenda-driven.  She accomplished a great deal, aided by those she conscripted to help her.  She was known to shop wherever she could smell a bargain.  Legendary at thrift shops and yard sales, Doris was relentless at studying wares and negotiating for a better deal.  Drawers and closets were filled with items acquired along the way, certain they would benefit her or someone else.  Yet, despite her joy in acquisition, her prudent management allowed her to be remarkably and admirably generous with her resources, as many recipients (organizations, agencies, and family members) can attest.

Above all, Doris was a people-person, engaging others with interest and conversation, spiced by good humor.  Her gregarious manner earned her friendships the world over and she maintained those relationships throughout her life.  She was the “clearinghouse” for communications among her extended family, spending endless hours on the phone each week to keep updated on everyone’s life.  For most of her years, her social calendar was overbooked and filled with interesting activities and visits.  To her dying day, her unfulfilled aspirations were the driving force of her life.

Doris was predeceased by her beloved husband, Calvin, and son, Timothy.  She is survived by three sons and their families: Stephen and Brandi (Mason and Sarianna) of Readfield ME, Paul and Wendy (Emily, Rebekah, Jenny, and Brenna) of Noank CT, and Peter and Carol (Nina, Irina, Vera, and Alex) of St. Johns FL, along with great-grandchildren and many other relatives.

A summer 2021 service will be planned in Speculator, New York, where she will be interred in the family plot in the village cemetery.

Donations in Doris’s memory may be sent to Westminster Woods at Julington Creek in St. Johns FL, Hendricks Avenue Baptist Church in Jacksonville FL, or Camp of the Woods in Speculator, NY.